Monday, April 18, 2011

My Fortune Cookie Says We're Screwed.

Well Gulls, today is the day. Tonight at 6 pm, Terry Cohen, Tim Spies, and Laura Mitchell will officially be made part of the City Council (tune into pac 14). While we don't mind the election of Laura Mitchell, I must say that I will be keeping a bucket handy for the swearing in of the other two.

Now, Gulls- this next part is very important: At tonight's meeting a new council president will be elected by the new group. Council president has a variety of special powers including the ability to keep certain initiatives on or off the table (as in- they can delay or speed up the process by which certain ordinances and bills get written into law). The Other Salisbury News predicts that within five minutes of Cohen and Spies being sworn into office, Debbie Campbell will be voted the new council president.

Here is why that's bad:

Deborah was instrumental in drafting a little law called 4-2. Maybe you've heard of it? It says no more than two unrelated people shall occupy certain residences at a time (even 4 bedroom residences- hence the 4 to 2). Yea, so that's a big part of why housing is so damn difficult to find in this city. The thing is- that law was geared specifically at college students (one of the top demographics of renters in Deborah's neighborhood), arguably because she didn't want to live next to us.

Now perhaps you are thinking, "Wait a minute, I thought Debbie was pro-students. After all, she went out of her way to participate in the We Love Salisbury campaign a few years ago...why would she do that if she didn't actually like us?" Well, Gulls, if you want the answer to that question you'll have to hit up Pat Gotham, our last SGA Pres. who got some grant money thanks to Debbie, what was it Pat, 2 years ago? We are confident he can answer any questions you may have for him personally.

As for The Other Salisbury News, we'll be drinking (no worries Duncan- we're all twenty one) because Salisbury is about to go downhill- fast.

1 comment:

John Robinson Sr. said...

I hope you all go to the City Council Meeting tonight!