Monday, April 11, 2011

City Council Minutes 4/11

Oy- We made it!
6:00- We apologize for missing the first couple minutes- we were out on official blog business :D
6:08- Kay Gibson is whining about the sidewalks...already? Whatever. Drink.
6:09- Paul Wilber is reading an Amendment...probably for the last time.
6:12- Tom Stevenson is whispering something to Paul Wilber...probly telling him which classifieds he's going to pursue.
6:15- Debbie expects people to tell her whats happening...Drink.
6:14- Resolution 2045. John Pick is reading... something about a housing plan. Shocker. I wonder if Paul's going to retire...
6:15- PTA must've been canceled. His highness has deigned to attend the meeting.
6:16- Cohen is asking a useless question. Drink.
6:17- Jim says the Daily Times was lying about soil samples. He managed to stay in his chair while talking. Well done Jim.
6:18- Cohen is speaking...Drink.
6:19- Jim is answering Terry. He really doesn't need to talk, his hands are more than capable of doing the talking. Anyway he's been harassing the EPA and wants credit.
6:20-OOOHHH Shanie is calling Jim out.
6:21- Debbie...come on Debbie...get it out. Lol she's still mad the city bought the property. Drink.
6:22- Debbie is still talking..."what are we thinking?" Lol, we are thinking that is a dumb question to spend tax money asking. Drink!
6:23- Jim's gettin heiffy!!! "Councilwoman Campbell, where did you get that information? That info is actually quite damning and I need to find out if someone has lied to you."
6:24- Cohen calls the Times liars...Drink for the Times. Everyone shits on them.
6:25- Terry is still talking...she's annoyed about mud puddles. Drink.
6:25- Shanie says she hasn't heard about this demolition. She takes one out of Debbie and Terry's book "we see people doing this all over the country..." Drink for Shanie who will be stuck on the new council.
6:28- Resolution something 46? It's about accepting 3 parcels of land...ownership of parcels...county agrees to accept these parcels. Lol, drink every time Pick says Parcels!
6:32- Pick is still talking about the property parcels...
6:33- Debbie is asking another frivolous question. Drink. She doesn't want to spend the money. Shocker.
6:35-"It just came to me..." Debbie. You are a public servant. This thought should have come to you earlier today- that way you would have showed up to the meeting prepared. You are a bigger waste of tax dollars than this stupid transfer of parcels.
6:36- Debbie-"What if there are insufficient funds?"
6:37- Someone who knows what he's talking about is telling Debbie her question is a dead issue.
6:37- Jim is yelling at Debbie! "Mrs Smith, I would like to know if Councilwoman has a point."
6:37- "Uh, Mayor before you were elected..." OMG. Jim is going to kill her. "...the taxpayers are being taken advantage offense to you..." ROTFLMFAO
6:38- Jim-"I appreciate that your interpretation of the situation...when I hear the word quagmire....staff has been working....I believe we are helping the Neighborhood Association... there are times when things have to get done...I will say publicly that that is your opinion and that may not always be correct." Wow. I never thought I'd say this but slow clap for Jim!
6:40- Debbie "If I could just finish. This reminds me of a couple of parcels on West Main St...."
6:42- John Pick "there is nothing we can do that I know of that can force Empire Mortgage to give the properties to the Community Association...the work would be done by the time the properties transfered...The Community Association wants these properties."
6:43- Debbie "They would be just as responsible for the upkeep of the property as anybody else in our city... you don't know how we would force the mortgage company to negotiate with the home-owners association...that is not a city role. I understand we are trying to assist the homeowners association....but other than taking this deal, we have no authority to force them to deal with anybody they ought to..." She's beating a dead horse. Drink.
6:45- Get em Gary! "I've been sitting at this table for the last few years listening to Ms. Campbell say the same thing over and over again...We have to deal with the facts....We are supposed to be helping the people of Harbor would become a community asset...a win-win is when everybody gets what they need- I think we've done a good job of creating a win-win here...I think this is the best way to mitigate this situation and I look forward to voting an affirmative to it."
6:48- Terry has "a few" questions. Here we go. Drink. "Good intentions are a wonderful thing but they get us into all sorts of trouble...I recognize that we are trying to help the neighborhood out...but insinuating ourselves into something... and have another company come to this city and use us as a conduit for a tax break....every time we have those tax breaks, thats less revenue...if we wanted to do something like tax incentives for our local small businesses we can't because we are making deals with companies like Empire Mortgage..." Wow. Now she's asking if "'provided that' the same thing as 'contingent upon'"? Terry, if you had looked at the bill you would already know that.
6:52- Jim is going to flip a shit. "It's difficult to sit here and be told, as the Mayor...I'm not sure what I've been accused of by the two councilwomen here but it's coming fast and's important we move forward in situations like this especially as we try to revitalize our urban core. Either we are a conduit to help the neighborhood or we are deal-makers. "
6:54-Debbie "Mr. Mayor we aren't accusing you of anything...things happened before you got here...urban decay...we are talking about mismanagement-I'm sorry you've taken offense but..."
6:55- Gary "Mayor, I hope this administration continues to work with Neighborhood association, property owners, and whoever else it takes to rid the city of problem properties...we can bring up things like what the responsibility is of certain people...we cannot write a policy for every situation we come across. I hope everybody works in a creative way to solve problems. It takes a willingness to work together. That's what happened here, we worked together and it worked out, and I'm glad it did." .
6:58- Shanie-$12,000 TO CUT THE GRASS???? Drink. "We need to move on to something else." Amen to that.
6:59- But Debbie's not going to move on is she? No. No she isn't. Drink. "Memorandum of Understanding..."
7:02- Terry "As I look at this particular paragraph..." Lord help us. Drink. "I'm concerned about this dragging on..." Lol, are you really Terry? It doesn't seem like it.
7:06- Debbie has a question. Drink. "What kind of mechanism is in place to make sure we bring it proper condition?" Paul Wilber must want to blow his brains out.
7:08- Debbie again. "The city is holding the bag...I don't know what else there is to a storm water pond other than the clay and the trees...Hindsight is a wonderful thing, I know nobody did it on purpose." My God. What is she talking about? Drink.
7:09- Debbie. "Is there a possibility..." Drink.
7:10- Jim-"There is a possibility that a martian could land on the property Mrs. Campbell! ...every time somebody takes a breath there is another complication...I don't know what else I could have done to get you to vote for this!"
7:11- Debbie "Here is what I worry about...he says this is not our scope of work...isn't there some simple language that can be put in here that says that whatever it takes to bring that up to proper condition is what we're signing up for?"
7:12- The Mayor got up and walked out.
7:13- Gary is trying to keep the peace. "This dead horse is about to start stinking. We need to vote and move on."
7:14- Louise tries to move on.
7:15- Debbie won't let her. "The Mayor has left to call Mrs. Gardener..."
7:16- Get her Gary! "Mrs. Campbell had all week to ask these questions she got this information last Wednesday! Now I don't care if I'm not going to be here I am a taxpaying citizen and I'm going to follow-"
7:16- Louise "Order!"
7:17- The Mayor has in fact returned. "Differing site conditions" apparently solve this problem. Dear Lord, he is cracking up- that's not good.
7:17- Louise says they should vote on it. They are about to vote-
7:18- Terry has a question. "I don't have a question, I have a comment...I hope that in the future all people at this table will be more respectful." My God. Drink.
7:19- They vote. It's unanimous. So basically the last hour and 15 minutes was a waste of our time.
7:20- Meeting is adjourned.

We would just like to say that Louise and Gary have done a great job in Council. We appreciate their hard work and wish them luck in all their future endeavors. Until next time Salisbury!


Anonymous said...

I look forward to this game every two weeks. Don't forget next monday night is the swearing in of the new circus.

Anonymous said...

Thank GOD I missed that. Good over view. I feel buzzed.

SAM.I.AM. said...

Blabber.....Blabber.... Hiccup.... Ummm. When are the Martians ...landing?

The Wonderful Wizard of Salisbury is passed out on my living room floor waiting for a new liver.

Someone call a bus.


Bill O'Writes said...

Wow. I don't know if this is really funny or really sad. Either way, shed a tear for City Council.

BlackSheba said...

Lol, it's both Bill. Hence the alcohol :)

Anonymous said...

So when the new council is sworn in how long before they find a canidate to replace Jimmy? Who do you think it may be? Silverstrim? Kay Gibson?

chuckie said...

I can honestly say i didn't play the game but, i do look forward to reading your post on council meetings in the future. It just astonishes me at how much unprepared someone can be and expects a paycheck for it.

Anonymous said...

Hangover here at work! Game was fun!

Anonymous said...

You guys are doing a great job. Please continue with your city council coverage. I love the way you write.

Anonymous said...

How long before Albero declares one of those upstairs apartments at 300 W. Main as his primary residence and runs for Mayor?

BlackSheba said...

Anon 9:19- From what our sources tell us, that will happen in the next couple of years...God help us all.

SalisburyForever said...

Okay, while I may not ALWAYS agree with you all, as a former Gull (and as someone who grew up in Salisbury), I have to say that you are spot on with Campbell and Cohen. I used to support both of them when I lived there, and then this time, when Cohen was running for re-election, she and Spies were campaigning around my old neighborhood. They sic'ed code and compliance on my 62 year old mother for (no joke) a piece of wood that was about 7 feet long and about 3 inches wide, and had a rotted spot on it about 6 inches long, near the bottom. She got threatened with a fine and she has had to pay THOUSANDS of dollars to make sure the house is PERFECT so she doesn't get fined. I am so sick that Cohen and Spies got elected. I wish I could have been there to vote against them both! All three of them (Campbell, Cohen, and Spies) are total asswipes and hopefully they will piss enough people off that they won't get re-elected.