Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Uhh Can We Get A Flare Please?

Some people are meant for leadership-Winston Churchill, Martin Luther King Jr., Jim Perdue... Others- not so much- but they lead us anyway. Such is the plight of Terry Cohen, Salisbury's newest City Council president. Terry's recent election reminds us of a story we once heard about a man named Edward J. Smith. Smith was a captain for the Royal Navy. He spent his whole life working his way up the line of British command, until finally he was one of the best captains the crown had to offer...or so he thought. Actually Smiths career was peppered with all kinds of dangerous mishaps, but he was always able to explain them, so he just kept getting promoted. One weekend as his cruise ship was chugging its way through some particularly perilous waters, Smith received a warning that he and his crew were in iceberg territory and ought to slow down. He ignored it. Smith got two more warnings of a similar nature all suggesting that he either reduce his speed or change his course due to inclement water conditions- he disregarded those as well. At 11:40 p.m. his ship crashed into an iceberg. Two hours and 1,500 lives later, the Titanic was gone.

Now, running with this little metaphor for a minute, we see that Jim Ireton is at Salisbury's helm, with Terry by his side as first mate. In the past few months, the passengers of the R.M.S. Salisbury have been screaming at these two people that there is an iceberg ahead (crime-based ruin of our local economy) and for months, we have been ignored. Why is that? What could they possibly be doing that is more important than avoiding an iceberg???

Apparently trimming a hedge. That's right Delmarva, the new City Council's first order of business was to approve Ordinance 2147 which addresses NUISANCE TREES AND SHRUBS!!! At this point there is really nothing that Terry, Tim, or Debbie can say to redeem themselves. We never liked them to begin with, but at this point it is clear that they are a downright liability. Terry can try to lecture us til she's blue in the face on why rosebushes are Priority #1 but it won't make much difference to a constituency that's clinging to a wardrobe in the middle of the Atlantic trying to make sure we don't die from gang violence. Send up a flare Delmarva, cause Salisbury is going down.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

so that means tim spies has clean up his yard?

Anonymous said...

This bill and the speed camera bill were passed on 2nd READING. The council didn't have any choice as to scheduling those votes.

If you want to criticize them, find something real.

A.Adams said...

A)I don't have a problem with the speed cameras- if Duncan says we need them, we need them.

B)The fact that the bill was written in the first place when the city is drowning in substantial problems is embarrassing; rosebushes should be the city's absolute last priority. Still, I can see how you could leap to their defense and blame it all on the docket. So how about this- Holierthanthou and I will compose a list of "real" problems the city ought to be working on (but isn't) and have it up by the end of the day. If that doesn't satisfy you (lol, and I get the feeling that it won't) then nothing will. Thanks for your input! Keep reading :)

Anonymous said...

Salisbury began to crumble when all the middle class manufacturing jobs were lost. Hell when I was young if your mom was a cashier at Giant and dad worked at dresser you were rich. Cambells leaving along with countless others brought us here.

Anonymous said...

Satire at its best. Keep it coming kids. Intelligent ribbing of over inflated political egos is exactly what's needed around here to encourage a little humility on Salisbury's elected officials.

Anonymous said...

One person in Newtown, who is a friend of the mayor, complained so much that the City legislated the entire city just to shut her up.

Anonymous said...

Absolutely brilliant analogy gentlemen!! Satire, in its truest form, took place years ago at a little place called Harvard - with the publishing of a cool little read called the National Lampoon. You two are a riot. Spot on in your side door lampooning of priorities. Gangs? Crime? Robberies in the park? No jobs for the SU grads to remotely apply for? No communication with landlords? Trifling stuff. But shrubs and trees? Now THAT'S important. Trying to turn the town back into the Debbie and Terry fantasy land of the 1960's, when they were picking daisies in our lilly white, picket fence backyards? Not gonna happen. Stay on 'em gentlemen. Love this stuff!!!

Anonymous said...

This blog is from an SU Student and they do not spell JIM PERDUE's name correctly. That last name is every where. Says a lot.

A.Adams said...

Anon 12:26, It really warms us to know that we have followers like yourself who read our blog so thoroughly and are dedicated to helping us improve. Keep giving your input and if you see any more mistakes be sure to let us know. We really appreciate the support. Thanks and have a great day!